http://www.interpals.net/mbox.php?todo=read&msg_id=51477844#history
sent at 8:02pm PDT on May 12, 2009
replied to at 3:38am PDT on May 13, 2009
Tee,

Thanks for your words and dance, a breathlessness about you, shallow and fast.  Yes, your words feel like dancing, and breathless energy.  Not revealing, no, not probing deep to root out meaning, not questioning but thrilling.  Tricking gravity.  Your words trick gravity.

Your colors, bright autumn maybe, but brighter like a flame.  And I can hear the crackling fire in your verse, sparks and popping wood maybe.

So, perhaps you can find something in my writing, a feeling maybe of earth or wood, an opposite energy to feed on?  I'd like to say I'm rooted, but it's a lie.  I drew another true picture yesterday, childishly simple in crayon, using my off hand.  Gray arches above, a black road on top, tapering down to nothing.  Below them lies the water, blue, flowing and swirling.  Crescent swirls, the magic of feeling and emotion, deep.  I live up on the arch, the gray black road, and in secret places I close my eyes and swirl in the water.  But the arches, they don't come down, they don't touch the water.  So I live, and you're a bit of space to float in that water.

I'm always explaining, and when you explained a little bit and your heart tells you to stop, so you let go of the story and dance again.  You're very beautiful like that.  These stories I make up to explain why I'm the way I am, why others are wrong and I"m right, they kill my breath.  So thank you for letting go and floating up away from the ground again.

I want you to feel wonderful about yourself, and sleep well.  I'm very disconnected from my feelings these days, and the dreams hit me hard at night, so I'll feel at least a sliver, a fraction.  Rationality is a fraction.  Death approaches, and the pain is too hot to touch.  I'm still a frightened child.  You can sleep well only when you've been gentle with what you can't accept about yourself.

I imagine you floating in sleep, sweet dreams.
E