With both World War 3 and a civil war brewing in what used to be the States, more and more now I regret not killing myself in the autumn of 2024.

My father underwent knee surgery today and is back home. Hopefully he is able to recover over the next two months, and hopefully I won’t implode from the stress of it all.

It’s starting to feel like 2023 again with these forest fires and the smoke coverage in North America.

Last night I got more confirmation that I’m a garbage person, and it makes me question my entire human existence and its worth. Indeed, I don’t think anyone outside of my parents would notice if I suddenly dissolve into nothingness, given how awful I must be in terms of opinion both nationally and internationally.

I’m beginning to think about what sounds from my white noise machine is capable of keeping me asleep and what makes me go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Namely, I should stick to white noise and stay away from water-based sounds.

Does anyone else have trouble with the game Diablo 4 freezing up when teleporting out of a dungeon? Sometimes I get a black screen making it impossible to continue playing, and it’s getting to the point that I don’t want to play it anymore.

I couldn’t get much sleep last night. I don’t know if it was due to me needing to go to the bathroom, the warm conditions in my apartment, the changing weather patterns, or the fact that the planet is trying to **** itself up and my questioning my will to live in lieu of this.

My cupcake cake for my 41st birthday.

Now that I am experiencing my 40th Valentine’s Day, I can say with certainty that the term ‘love’ doesn’t exist in my part of the world anymore. Instead, all I seem to perceive is indifference at best and hatred at worst.

I may as well say it now: what used to be the States is now a pariah cesspit and it deserves to dissolve into civil war. And if I have to destroy myself in order to escape from the nihilistic mindlessness that is now commonplace, I’d do so if only so I can ask the Divine Energy why it allowed our species to exist, knowing how much it has become a hideous mistake, let alone myself.