A man goes to the doctor and says: 'Doctor, there's a piece of lettuce sticking out of my bottom.' The doctor asks him to drop his trousers and examines him.
The man asks: 'Is it serious, doctor?' and the doctor replies: 'I'm sorry to tell you, but this is just the tip of the iceberg

For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 40 +, there is a balding, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.

What women want: To be loved, to be listened to, to be desired, to be respected, to be needed, to be trusted, and sometimes, just to be held. What men want: Tickets to the World Series

MY FRIENDS JOKE OF THE DAY -
TO FUNNY

Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle

Women don't make fools of men most of them are the "do-it-yourself" types.

In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out.
-- Joey Adams

My ancestors wandered lost in the wilderness for 40 years because even in biblical times, men would not stop to ask for directions.

"Take risks: if you win, you will be happy; if you lose, you will be wise."