It is I, Guillaume the guillauming Guillauminator from a guillaumiverse full of guillauminations.

If you are reading this line right now it means two things. First, congratulations, you know how to read and second, you clicked on my profile and I am eternally grateful for that.

If you’re still thinking about texting me, here are some facts about me to help you understand what you are getting yourself into :

- I am not important yet because nobody came from the future to assassinate him.

- I like rice because it is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

- I hate when people say I look younger on pictures because technically every picture is of me when I was younger.

- I noticed that "I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing, except when I am at a funeral.

- I have a map of the world that is 1:1 scale and I currently live on page 14.

- I find that a duck's opinion of me is very much influenced by whether or not I have bread.

If you don't know how to break the ice, you can always try to help me get those questions answered.

If I try to fail and I succeed, did I fail?

If I eat myself, do I become twice as big or disappear completely?

Aren’t all generalizations false – including this one?

Do caterpillars know they’re gonna be butterflies or are they like “What the hell is happening?!”

Isn’t Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?



Last request:
Your answer rate should be reasonable, my beard shouldn't turn white before you say " I am ok, thanks".

Any language exchange based on curiosity is welcome.

British English (native) speakers are highly appreciated (accents and cultural accuracy).

German help would also be very welcome. I still sound like a confused tourist.

Writing.
Finished a novel in January, and always into short stories to keep the craft alive.

Video games.
35+ year ongoing relationship. I lived through multiple generations, loading times, controller shapes, and questionable design choices. Still an avid retro gamer.

Mostly Classic Rock, my favorite being Queen.  Toto, Genesis, Pink Floyd, Deep Purple, The Police...
Classic Pop and Funk like Michael Jackson, Prince, Stevie Wonder....
Hard Rock and Metal, everything from AC/DC to Death Metal sang in Latin.
Movie Scores the likes of Danny Elfman, Hans Zimmer, John Williams...

The true love of my life. I grew up as a child of the ’80s and a teenager of the ’90s, surrounded by all the iconic films of the time — Gremlins, Ghostbusters, Batman ’89, Back to the Future... But over time, that early passion turned into something deeper, and I became a true cinephile, drawn to every corner of cinema: indie gems, timeless classics, and the wonderfully weird and nerdy.

Same as the movies. I am watching shows since forever but if I would have to pick my three favorites, I would say The Twilight Zone, Oz, and Parker Lewis Can't Lose.

Let's say that Dune and Shakespeare are taking the majority of my reading time.

X88B88 looks like the word voodoo reflecting off of itself.